Cats Have Staff – Friday Follies

Instead of Twitter’s  “Friday Follows” , I have my own twist that I call Friday Follies.  

I’ve mentioned before that Fridays are my day to “be me.”  A day when I don’t take myself so seriously.  Not write about anything important..at least in the serious, “what do you do and how can I help” sense. 

No trends.  No patterns.  No consistency. 

Freestyle.  Only one rule.  That I have fun.  Not at anyone else’s expense. If I laugh at anyone today, it’s only me…and my foil-ables!

Today I thought  I’d throw out a few comments about my feline friends.    How they make me laugh…how they command my attention…and how they run the house.

There is no doubt whatever.  Cats Have Staff

There are numerous quotes about cats and their independent nature.     Here’s one by Bill Alder that I really like:

“The cat is there when you call her – if she doesn’t have something better to do.”

And here’s another by Mark Twain that captures their essence:  

 “Of all God’s creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.”

Cats are totally independent creatures, and they want to make sure that you understand that you are here to serve them…not the other way around.  While a dog will wag its tail, and always want to please you, a cat wants to please you…only if there’s something in it for them!!!

Here’s a case in point:  Our cats have an “outdoor patio;”  a secure upstairs deck where they can be outside and yet protected from coyotes, owls, and other predators that happen to share our environment.  They have a special cat door fitted to a window where they can slip in and out to the deck when they want.  The deck, however, also has a “human” door, so we…the humans.. can go in and out also.   Or…at least.. that’s what I used to think.  

Until I was properly trained.

What I have learned  [or have been trained to respond to] is that the real purpose of the human door is for the cats to go in and out when they don’t want to use the cat door.   When they feel so inclined they call us…  allow us a brief moment of petting…and ensure we get the imbedded command…   “Open the human door for me…NOW.  I don’t feel like going through the cat door at this moment.   It’s so small.  And I just ate.  I’m feeling a little bloated.   And… there’s something even more important.   I… have…Staff –You!”

The message couldn’t be more clear.  When the call comes, the Cat frequently isn’t even at the door.  If the Cat  is in the middle of room, when I respond to her call…that plaintive, “Help…can’t you tell I need you now?” cry… she will walk me to the door [human].  Then, asking for a chin rub (only a ruse, a bribe  to make sure I respond appropriately), she will rub her head against the door frame, and stretch up to the door knob.   Then, she will turn her head toward me and purr ever so pleasingly, to convey her message. 

If I am silly enough not to open the door immediately, she will take me through the routine again… drop down to the floor, allow me to scratch her chin and pet her, and then reach up to the doorknob…”OK, enough already…why do you think we are here???”  until, of course, I open the [human door] for her to go through.

And… we have two cats.  If one is already on the deck, and sees the other issuing commands for me to open the door, the second one will go to the deck side of the door and stretch. 

One cat in…one cat out.  Unless… at the last moment, one can’t make up its mind.  Then we all stand at the door, letting the flies in. 

All day long.   Except when I am gone or through some furtive maneuver, manage to elude their directive…in which case they somehow manage to get in to and out of the patio through their cat door.

I admit, however, that I am very well trained.  I respond like Pavlov’s dogs.  I salivate at the opportunity to serve.   Because my reward…the purr, the snuggle, the playing, the very occasional lick of my hand…is  so very fulfilling.  I am a slave to the Feline Furry.  

  I am willing to say without reservation…at least at this home…Cats Have Staff.

One thought on “Cats Have Staff – Friday Follies

  1. While my cats are “well aware” that they have their very own door…should they choose to use it…I appreciate the feedback and have had friends who have been unsuccessful in getting their animals to use the pet door. This is good advice that I am happy to share!

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